Waiting

Because of the LORD's great love we are not consumed,
for his compassions never fail.

They are new every morning;
great is your faithfulness.

I say to myself, "The LORD is my portion;
therefore I will wait for him."

Lamentations 3:22-24

I've been struck recently by God's faithfulness. We haven't gotten a job offer yet. My Grandma Unruh is in the ICU. I'm having the hardest time getting my school work done. And even though I've been a lazy christian, I'm seeing and feeling God's faithfulness. I'm anxious to see what's next and I'm nervous that I can't make a big decision. I'm afraid I won't be able to try something new. I've had so many daydreams about this or that, moving mostly but there is peace now. I'm guilty for choosing to do anything but spend time with the Lord. Am I afraid of what he'll see? Even in my laziness, my lack of faith, God is faithful, and he is good. I know that wherever we go it's his best for us, and if that's 4 states away from my family then that is where I want to be. He's been preparing my heart to let go. First with Grandpa Thennes in May and now Grandma U, he's been teaching me that my home is not there. My life is not there. Yes, my family is there but my responsibility is my home, and my school, and my husband here. Maybe it will soon be Illinois, and maybe it will soon be Colorado. Either way, I am no longer afraid. My God will provide for us, and His will be done.